How did you get into this? The synopsis: I walked through the doors of the LA Aix Sex Championships with no intent of competing, but just to go “check it out.” Then two girls there said anyone can enter and that I should do it. And then I did. And then it was the people in the crowd that helped me develop my routine with their ideas and cheered me on to win the LA competition and move onto the finals. The details: Shanghai Slammer Fucks Air
Ever since I started this blog, I’ve been compelled (and slightly obligated) to live up to it. Thanks to the bright idea of creating this website, I’ve wet my bed and now must sleep in it. This is both a bad and good thing. Bad that it doesn’t feel very comfortable stepping out of my comfort zone everyday and good that the website holds me accountable and forces me to do it. And tonight, it’s been the most uncomfortable to date.
So now that I can reasonably approach women for dating purposes, whether running around doing errands during the day or in bars, clubs, and lounges at night, my next level of improvement is my ability to show more direct interest in a woman and be more sexual.
But before I dive deeper into that, I’ll explain what I mean about direct interest and sexuality. Without having these two qualities as a man, a guy will eventually end up in the friend zone with a woman and never have the opportunity to have any sexual relationship with her. A man may be able to have a fun conversation with a woman and generate interest and attraction, but won’t get any farther if he is unable to show that she turns him on as a fine sexy woman. (And from a woman’s perspective, who doesn’t want to be a desirable and beautiful creature.) So that’s where I’m at right now – I can talk to women, but my biggest challenge at the moment is getting over the fear of putting my balls on the line, risking rejection, and showing women that I am sexually attracted to them as a man. Continue reading 'Talk Dirty to Me, Baby!'»
I saw this video a year ago about giving out free hugs and thought it was pretty cool:
From a social anxiety standpoint, how awkward would it be to go up to people (without a sign) and just ask for a hug? It made me a little uncomfortable when I thought about it, especially when it means approaching other men, whether they are alone, with a group, or extremely masculine and tough-looking. I mean, how weird would it look for a guy to walk up to big muscular or tattooed random dude and asking him for a hug. What about approaching a group of guys, couples, families, or girls? As a result, I had to go do it. Continue reading 'Free Hugs'»
Today I was at the supermarket with my gal pal and we were buying some pie crust for our cookoff tonight. (I made my cauliflower and zucchini soup, quinoa vegetable salad, and hemp milk pudding and she made her delicious apple pie with whip cream and vanilla bean ice cream.) We only had 3 items, so we got into the express lane at Ralphs:
Cashier: Do you have a Ralphs’ card? Me: No. I don’t have mine today. Can I use yours? Cashier: Do you have a phone number? Me: No. I don’t have card. Can I use yours? Cashier:[Hesitates, but eventually uses hers.]
Cashier: That’ll be $8.97. Me: OK. [I reach into my two pockets, one on each side of my cargo shorts, pull out two fistfuls of change and throw them onto the counter. A few coins fall down to the ground. By this time, there were 3 people in line behind me.] Let’s see…1, 2, 3, 4, 5,…[counting the pennies]…28, 29… Continue reading 'Hold On. I Have Change.'»
One day I was walking on Venice Boardwalk and saw little children dancing carefree in front of this street performer who was singing. I looked at them and was amazed that I used to have that type of attitude. I do what I wanted without a care in the world or what other people thought of me. And as I grew up, societal conditioning caused me to think otherwise. I started becoming more conscious of the things I was doing because I was afraid that I might look bad in front of my friends, colleagues, family, and even strangers. I became inhibited, stifled, and shy and reverted back into a social cocoon.
After thinking about it a little more, I realized that having these types of anxieties were preventing me from doing a lot of things in life. It was stopping me from approaching and meeting the women I was really attracted to because of reasons like fear of rejection or what other people would think if they saw me fail. It was stopping me from talking and networking with people that would be helpful in my business. It was stopping me from telling people what I really wanted and how I felt about them. Continue reading 'Importance of Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone'»
I was at PetSmart today and had one of these spur of the moment things. I was at the register buying a new doggie chew toy and the cashier was ringing me up. When she finished, a customer had just walked in and asked her a question. To help the customer, the cashier walked away from the cash register. All of a sudden, the phone was ringing.
Me:[Thinking to myself] Hey, the phone’s ringing and she walked away. No one’s answering it. I wonder what would happen if I picked up the phone and answered it. That would be weird and a little uncomfortable. Oh shit…it’s uncomfortable. I should do it!Continue reading 'Answering the Phone'»
I’ve noticed that when I’m at a stoplight in my car and start looking around at the drivers, most of them are looking forward in this dazed look and would rarely make eye contact with me. Once in a while you catch them, but their eyes quickly dart away. So today, I’m going to start working on getting eye contact with drivers and holding it long enough until they are the first ones to break.
I was at the Irvine Spectrum yesterday and was asking people for 10-minute instant dates to join me on the Ferris wheel. Since I was with Frankie, I thought it might have been a little too weird to ask just one person, so I was targeting groups of two.
Today I was having one of those days where I’ve been feeling pretty good about approaching women. When I’m out and about now, I’m actually eager to spot cute girls. I was in Santa Monica doing some work and had to step out onto Third Street Promenade to get something. As I was walking around, I saw a couple of the cuties I really liked. It was then where I got scared again. I was able to open and make a comment to one, so at least that was cool. I passed another potential cute one at the corner, but didn’t turn around and go back because I got scared again.
It’s an interesting situation. In the past few days, I’ve been feeling supremely confident at times and now I feel like a chicken again. But after a little while, I realized that this has been much better than several months ago. Back then, I used to be chicken all the time and not confident any time. So putting it into that perspective helped a lot because now it’s confident some of the time and only chicken some of the time (and much less of one than before).
But as I was walking back to the office, I thought about my situation right now: I feel very confident when I approach the women that I’m only moderately attracted to. I have that feeling of “I can do this.” But when it comes to the women that I’m really attracted to, I get scared wondering if I’m good enough for them and give them all the power. So on one hand, I didn’t want to date the ones that were only moderately attractive because I wanted to go for the perfect girl. On the other hand, I was still scared of the perfect girl. Dilemma right?
But when I asked Brian about it the other day, he said to go do both. Instead of this being mutually exclusive, go for both types of women. He recommended that I should date the women I’m moderately attracted to (my 7’s and 8’s) while simultaneously going for the ones I’m super attracted to (my 9’s and 10’s). It was such a simple and easy answer, I wonder why I didn’t think of it. Makes sense to learn to date and get comfortable with women in general while I build my experience and confidence during the process.
So by the time I got back to the office, I was both enlightened and frustrated. I’m glad I had my epiphany, but wasn’t satisfied that I didn’t really go for those two other girls I saw. After a little while, I knew what I had to do. Continue reading 'Spilling My Guts and Being Vulnerable'»
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What do you want to become again?
Ever since I started this blog, I’ve been compelled (and slightly obligated) to live up to it. Thanks to the bright idea of creating this website, I’ve wet my bed and now must sleep in it. This is both a bad and good thing. Bad that it doesn’t feel very comfortable stepping out of my comfort zone everyday and good that the website holds me accountable and forces me to do it. And tonight, it’s been the most uncomfortable to date.
So now that I can reasonably approach women for dating purposes, whether running around doing errands during the day or in bars, clubs, and lounges at night, my next level of improvement is my ability to show more direct interest in a woman and be more sexual.
Today I was at the supermarket with my gal pal and we were buying some pie crust for our cookoff tonight. (I made my cauliflower and zucchini soup, quinoa vegetable salad, and hemp milk pudding and she made her delicious apple pie with whip cream and vanilla bean ice cream.) We only had 3 items, so we got into the express lane at Ralphs:
One day I was walking on Venice Boardwalk and saw little children dancing carefree in front of this street performer who was singing. I looked at them and was amazed that I used to have that type of attitude. I do what I wanted without a care in the world or what other people thought of me. And as I grew up, societal conditioning caused me to think otherwise. I started becoming more conscious of the things I was doing because I was afraid that I might look bad in front of my friends, colleagues, family, and even strangers. I became inhibited, stifled, and shy and reverted back into a social cocoon.
I was at PetSmart today and had one of these spur of the moment things. I was at the register buying a new doggie chew toy and the cashier was ringing me up. When she finished, a customer had just walked in and asked her a question. To help the customer, the cashier walked away from the cash register. All of a sudden, the phone was ringing.
I’ve noticed that when I’m at a stoplight in my car and start looking around at the drivers, most of them are looking forward in this dazed look and would rarely make eye contact with me. Once in a while you catch them, but their eyes quickly dart away. So today, I’m going to start working on getting eye contact with drivers and holding it long enough until they are the first ones to break.
I was at the Irvine Spectrum yesterday and was asking people for 10-minute instant dates to join me on the Ferris wheel. Since I was with Frankie, I thought it might have been a little too weird to ask just one person, so I was targeting groups of two.
